Tete a Tete
by mythweaver1
Summary: FFIV. Post-TAY. NON CANON. Oneshot. Kain and Izayoi are generally dysfunctional. They can't even get engaged properly...


**A/N: This is actually being posted slightly out of order. I was supposed to have posted a different story first, but that's proving to be a bit more of an exercise in patience. In the meantime…this. **

**I suppose I should do some set-up first…this takes place after Ceodore and Ursula's wedding…and there's a bit of a joke concerning that, that Moonclaw and I are perpetuating…**

**Also, I'm borrowing a few of Moonclaw's peeps in the process ;)**

**Um. Uh. Enjoy?**

**Tete a Tete**

Izayoi strode across Kain's office with a sheaf of papers in her hand.

"Do you see these?" she insisted, searing Kain with a blistering look just as he wisely shut the door. "Do you _see _these?"

His expression and response did little to inspire her confidence. "Of course I see them," he replied solemnly, leaning back to sit on the edge of a desk.

She laughed sharply, and threw the pile onto the desk beside him, placing her hands defiantly on her waist.

"Congratulations on your forthcoming nuptials," she scoffed. "To think."

Kain grabbed her by the hips and pulled her closer, quieting her tirade as she paused to stare at him. "To think what?" he asked calmly.

She irritatedly batted a strand of hair out of her face. "Just because we served as placeholders for the Maid of Honor and the Best Man, the entire _world _seems convinced that we're the next item of gossip."

Kain grinned, which did even less to ingratiate him on Izayoi. "I wonder who started _that _rumor."

Izayoi stepped out of his grip and continued to pace, pointing violently around the room at imagined adversaries. "Rosa," she snapped. "Or any of her hand maidens; or Ursula, or Cecil, or _Edward_," for Crystals' sake.

"I think we've played all of our cards," Kain pointed out, trying to remain composed about the situation. "Everyone knows."

"Between my cousin and your apprentice, I'm not sure who is more at fault," she seethed. "But for Cuore and Kieran to conveniently absent themselves and leave the two of us in the lurch…" she trailed off, glancing at Kain over her shoulder. "Do you think they planned this?"

"Planned to miss the wedding of their friends?" Kain asked. "Unlikely, but—" he paused, making a speculative face. "I don't think they minded being inconvenienced."

Izayoi turned to face him fully. "We had to stand up in a wedding," she reminded him, pointing while she slowly advanced. "We had to stand in the wings for the _entire _four hour debacle that Rosa made of it, _and _we had to dance in front of our friends and families."

"_Your _family," he interjected.

She waved her hand at the irrelevance of the fact. "We were put in the center of everyone's bullseye, and now they're using us for sport," she said.

Kain shrugged. "Annoying, yes, but it was inevitable, really."

"I had to wear a _dress," _she complained. "Izayoi, you'll look so lovely on your wedding day," she recited with an unusually nasal voice. "You had the glow that comes of a woman in love," she repeated again, narrowing her eyes at the pile of papers that all held best wishes and congratulations on their "engagement". She clapped her eyes back on Kain. "I was glowing because I'd been _drinking," _she shouted, throwing her hands in the air with disgust and deciding to pace some more.

"You know," Kain said uncertainly, as if testing the waters before he dove into them. "I think Ceodore and Ursula were on to something when they eloped."

"They should have stayed eloped and not made us go through this ridiculous affair," Izayoi retorted.

"Eloping would be quiet, unobtrusive, private…" Kain continued listing off to himself, until Izayoi paid attention long enough to stop pacing and stare at him.

"Kain Highwind, if I didn't know any better, I'd say you were actually proposing to me," Izayoi brazenly announced.

He sighed, staring blandly back at her. "Of course not, since you find the idea disgusting and a waste of your time."

She arched a brow and walked closer until she was standing right in front of him. "Since when did I ever say it would be a waste of my time?" she demanded, poking him in the shoulder. "You've never made an offer worth considering."

"You've never indicated that you wanted an offer," he answered, perplexed.

"You need to be more assertive," she replied.

"Are you asking me to propose?" he asked, taking her by the hips again.

"Not if you're going to ask for my permission," she teased, letting him draw her in.

"Then no, I'm not asking you to marry me," he answered.

Izayoi pouted disappointedly. "Why not, am I not wife material?"

"I'm not sure if you're _wedding _material," he replied with a grin, sliding one hand up her arm and shoulder to rest on the nape of her neck; pulling her closer until their lips nearly met.

"Let's be honest," she said, staring mischievously into his eyes. "You're not wedding material either."

He kissed her, only enough to tease her. "It's decided, then," he said. "We shouldn't get married."

She stared at him for a full moment before taking either side of his face in her hands and kissing him soundly. "Shut up and elope with me," she commanded breathily, very much preoccupied with his lips.

He laughed and returned the affectionate gesture, mumbling, "As you wish."

0-0-0

**A/N: Dur, dur, dur…where did this come from ;)**

**There was an idea tossed around a few months ago how…Kain and Izzy would TOTALLY get engaged by "accident". I'd had a SLIGHTLY different scene in mind, but this one works just as well, hehe. **

**Thanks for reading ;)**

**~Myth**


End file.
